Q: What's the story behind the name Pizza Pants?
A: My friend Julie Golden and I used to fool around, talking in an outrageously fake Italian accent, and "pizza pants" was something we liked to say. Julie made it up, not me. She drowned a few years ago. Try saying "pizza pants" with a funny fake accent. You'll see how fun it is.
Q: Has anyone ever told you that you look like George Harrison?
A: No. I think I do, but no one agrees with me, except my mom, but only because I kept bugging her about it.
Q: Are you Dutch?
A: No. I'm from Texas.
Q: Do you have a hangnail problem?
A: No. I've never had a hangnail in my life. I'm not really sure what a hangnail is, anyway.
Q: Has anyone ever told you that you look like Guy Pearce, who appeared in L.A. Confidential and Memento?
A: Yes. Unfortunately, one person has told me this. This person thinks I especially look like him around the mouth. I do not agree. There's just something about Pretty-Boy Pearce that I don't like.
Q: Has anyone ever told you that you bear a strong resemblance to Molly Ringwald?
A: Sigh. Yes. From the age of 12 until, oh, around the time I turned 18, I heard this one almost every day. Literally, almost every day. Then I outgrew it; I've been getting it again recently.